Out of the Ashes

By Susan Mardele

I stand tall in this life I’ve woven,
looking back at who I’ve been.

A baby, dependent on loving and flawed people,
I learned to please.

A child learning to survive in a family,
I became what was wanted and needed.

A young woman with no clue about life,
I morphed into what was expected.

A wife and mother with my own family,
I gave myself wholeheartedly.

A single mother with responsibility for another’s life,
I threw myself into the task.

I have tried so many forms of giving my Self away.
Each was buried in the white-hot inferno of the next.

Continuing to search for the real life,
I dig through the ashes of those old selves.

For the bits of authenticity
that shine out, unharmed.

And I build my life on those,
knowing now what I didn’t know then.

What I will and will not tolerate,
what I like and love, how I prefer to live.

Now an independent woman living my own life,
I give myself to me.

Stepping forward into possibility,
I am my own woman.